Saturday, March 7, 2009

Have a nice day, Ma'am

Yesterday was the typical Friday. Mark, my youngest crumb snatcher and I out running errands. I stop by the bank because the hubby has the card and check book.

Our second stop was the dreaded Walmart for prescriptions and grocery shopping. As I stand in line holding the cart. Mark sucking his thumb, scowling at everyone who looks in his direction while digging his toes into mama's stomach. 

Next person in line moves up to the counter. I inch my cart a little more forward trying not to knock the lady in front of me in the rear, while trying to save my own bum from the bumper cart behind me. 

Finally its my turn. I move forward, angle my cart out of the way, and removing Marks toes from my stomach. He scowls even harder at the cute young girl behind the pharmacy counter. I smile...

Me:    "Kendra Wagner...W.a.g.N.e.r, There should be three."

She turning, finding the W's. Of course mine are in the back. She counts.

Cute teenie tech: "Yes, three today"

Ring, Ring Ring...and the price on the register reads $12.00. Oh, how I love insurance. I find my wallet, pull out a $100.00 bill. Mark reaches for my wallet and pulls, he wants to chew on the pretty read leather. I pull back...I prefer he didn't. He gives a puffy lip and scowls at me. I turn and hand the bill to the Teenie pharm tech cheerfully. She looks strangely at the bill. Holds it up to the light.

Me: stupid joke "I just made it this morning."

Pulls it down again...looks more closely. Then holds it up to the light again. Finally....

Cute teenie Tech: "I'm sorry Ma'am, but this is fake"

No she didn't just call me MA'AM!

Me: "What? I was kidding!"

Cute teenie Tech: "Sorry ma'am, but this isn't real." 

Me: "What? What do you mean not real?"

Cute teenie tech: "I don't see the head on the other side."

Glancing behind me at all the faces scowling at me as if I'm a criminal and have the audacity to hold up the line. 

Me: "It came from the bank, it has to be real." 

Cute Teenie Tech: handed it back "Sorry ma'am, NEXT!"

I wonder dazed out of the pharmacy into the crowded aisle. Still ticked she called me ma'am...and because of the scene of course. I know its real. It looks real to me. I head to the the front registers with money in hand.

I see a friendly face I know and explain what happened. She takes her black money marker and marks the bill. Its real. She calls the manager, she comes to walk me over to the pharmacy. She pulls the teenie tech aside. Speaking to her as if she was 3 inches tall and dumber than a box of painted rocks. 

Cute Teenie Tech: "It doesn't have the 3D image" (so I guess someone told her what the OTHER FACE, was actually called)

Manager: "It's an old bill"

Cute Teenie Tech: "But, its not real...there is no image"

Manager: "IT'S AN OLD BILL."

This goes on for a few minutes. The manager finally pushing her aside and rings me up. Takes my bill, gives change... 

Me: "Thank you"

Manager : "Sorry for all the trouble, I hope you have a nice day MA'AM."


  1. I wonder how many other people she's done that too, who maybe were just about as smart as she is and believed her?!

  2. How weird! And to think she called you ma'am too!