Tuesday, April 7, 2009


She's been in the hospital since last Thursday. She developed eschar on three large spots on her foot. 8 months of the pain and wound clinic just did not help. The infection has gone down into the bone. They've been pumping major antibiotics in since Friday but its not working. Elevation has made some of the color around her toes improve but still not very well. They've called in two specialist. Both agree that the leg needs to come off right above the knee. My mom requested a second opinion, he should arrive sometime today. Although I don't blame her a bite for asking, I personal don't see a way to save it. Eschar also is appearing on the other foot.

I am living a horror. I have no idea what to do for her and she is not a strong person emotionally. I feel a little closed off, but I know I'm doing that to myself to keep my chin up. I have NO idea how I can still care for her after this. She being a very heavy woman...there is just no way I can help much without live in home care which we can not afford.

I feel like the worst daughter in the world not being able to be at the hospital with her as much as she needs me. But with the three kids, not really having family and friends that aren't working who can take them. I just can't be up there since its Spring Break and the kids are out of school. Ugh, its just a mess. I'm babbling....just keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

I want to say this to those reading. Take care of your body!!! Do it NOW. My father lost both his legs due to blood clots. He was a VERY active man all his life. But he smoked and drank like a fish and paid the price. My mother..never watched her diet or exercised much. Developed diabetes in midlife and didn't change her lifestyle. Diabetes WILL kill you. Don't put faith in medication alone...you yourself have to make changes early. She is only 54. So young..yet so old.


  1. ((((Kendra)))) I am so glad to see you post. I've been worrying about you! CARRY A CELL PHONE WOMAN! Is there anything I can do? If I could, I would be up there in a heartbeat. Please don't beat your self up over this. I know it's hard but you did not do this. You have a life of your own and your Mother needs something more than what you can give and that IS NOT YOUR FAULT! I wub you and I'm here anytime you need me! Day or night!

  2. Praying for you Kendra and your mom. You're not a horrible daughter. You're realistic in what you're capable of doing.

  3. My Dad was a diabetic and so am I, he lived with me for 4 years before he died. He also lost one of his feet at the ankle so I have been there. I know you are going through some tough times right now. Just be there when you can for your mom she will understand. Rely on the Lord in your time of need, which is everyday.

  4. ((((Kendra)))) Thoughts and prayers for your family.

  5. ((((Kendra))) Thoughts and prayers for you and your Mom. Please, if you need anything, call, email, or SCREAM! LOL You have done so much for your Mom, and will continue to do so much for her whether she is at home with you or in someplace else that will help care for her, and might turn out to be good for her.

    When the time came for my DH's Grandmother to move out of her family home and into assisted living, it tore everyone up, her the most. But after being there for about 2 months, she said it was the best thing she did, and she should have done it sooner.

  6. ((((Kendra)))) I am so sorry. You are all in my prayers. Hang in there, you are a wonderful daughter, it is just the situation is difficult. Hang in there Mama.

  7. Lots of good thoughts and prayers sent your mom's way. So sorry to hear. :-(

  8. Kendra
    I am praying for you and your mom hun ... She will pull through this just hang in there sweetie. If there is anything i can do, you know where I am hun.
    Hugs and much love Sedona

  9. Kendra--

    I had not seen this post until today-- I am so sorry to hear about everything you, your mom, and your family are going through. An amputation is always tough. You are NOT a horrible daughter, you are having perfectly normal feelings and fears about all of this. I am so sorry it's so hard. Drop me an email if you need to talk.

    Lots of love, hugs, and light

    :) K